Dear Mr. Cory Jarvis,
Here is the latest edition of the “Letters from People” Global News update. Enjoy.
A woman found a rat in a Chef Boyardee can. Hurry kids, if you want to be allowed in the magical Boyardee factory, there are only seven more rats out there!
As protests continue the US warns citizens about travel to Thailand. Officials especially warned men hoping to pick up young Thai girls saying that if the woman has a bulge in her pants, whether protester or not, you’re about to be robbed of something.
Nebraska’s Gov. is set to sign a bill requiring women to be screened for mental health before being allowed to have an abortion. Republicans rallied around him after statistics showed that allowing mentally unstable women to terminate their pregnancy would cause future shortages in tea party membership.
A California man made threats to Nancy Polosi because he was angered over health care. He later apologized, admitted he was a recently laid-off health insurance claim inspector, and said keeping people in pain is a hard habit to break.
An Alaskan eagle survived a death spiral plunge after a mid-air mating dance.The worst part of it all is the eagle didn't even like the other bird but was just being a wing-man for his friend who flew off with a chubby pigeon.
Michelle Obama made an official visit to Mexico. During her tour she found a new way to help obese American kids that involves factory work sponsored by the Gap.
Cookbook recipe calls for ground black people. To be fair, right before that it says to smash all the crackers.
A poll finds tea party backers wealthier and more educated than the general public. How white are these people? Let's just put it this way, some of them were calling John McCain the n word.
S.E.C. staffers were busy watching porn as the economy crashed. They said women at the bars repeatedly rejected they're I.P.O’s so the needed a way to get their stocks up.
7-eleven introduced their own brand of beer. Company execs say it's just one more exciting product they can offer customers wanting explosive diarrhea.
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